My Bookshelf: Wild Concept

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Title: Wild Concept

Author: C. S. Boyack

Genre: Science Fiction/ Adventure

Amazon Summary:

“Lisa Burton is a new kind of robot. Built in the concept lab, she will be dismantled at the end of the experiment.

Lisa is a bit naive when she starts her new life, but soon learns to fit into modern society.

She gets assigned to the Hudson Police Department to study how she reacts to pressure, stress, and the everyday world. Hudson PD assigns her to a homicide case to catch the Escort Executioner.

When the escorts start showing up dismembered, she decides not to conclude her own experiment. She takes off on her own adventure to turn the tables on her creators.”

My Summary:

Yeah, this was about a robot who was basically human and wants to solve crimes. She also likes tattoos.

Cheers:

  • It was an interesting concept, and Lisa was pretty unique.
  • The gambling thing was pretty interesting and it seemed accurate enough.
  • Though I had to suffer through the terrible aspects of the book, the story was alright.

Jeers:

  • The editing was non-existent. This is the kind of book that gives self-published authors a bad name. There were mistakes, formatting issues, no breaks between scenes (literally, it’ll go from Lisa going to sleep to her being at the crime scene with no warning). I’m not talking a few mistakes here and there, I’m talking the whole book.
  • The police information is unrealistic. I took detailed notes to forward to the author, but the biggest thing that jumped out at me was that they found out a girl was dead and they said, “Oh, well it’ll suck when we have to inform the family in the morning.” No. Just no. (I plan on working in the criminal justice field, so it really bothered me.) He could’ve at least reached the level of accuracy that cop dramas work for, but it wasn’t even at that level.
  • Not only were there errors and typos that had missed editing, but there were some scenes that were just plain bad writing.

Would I recommend it?:

No. Maybe if it was edited by a professional, but not in it’s current state. Don’t waste your money, there are better robot stories out there.

Additional comments:

Again, I was sad to see such a terrible self-published book. It was worse because the story had promise, but the author refuses to improve his story. When I emailed him my notes explaining that he HAD to edit (even just on his own) and put in breaks to show jumps in time, his defense was that he didn’t really have time for that, so he wasn’t going to, despite releasing other titles and having plenty of time to blog. He just didn’t care.  He also said “No, all of this is completely accurate” when I pointed out the stuff he fudged about the police, citing his work in a branch of criminal justice that was NOT the homicide department that he was confused about. (Disclaimer: I read this a while ago, so he *may* have edited it since then, but I don’t think he has. I’ll be happy to reconsider my opinion if he does some major editing.)

Amazon link:

http://www.amazon.com/Wild-Concept-C-S-Boyack-ebook/dp/B00IIWQ10A

Author’s blog:

http://coldhandboyack.wordpress.com/

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The Worst Way to Start A Story

I just began writing something and I have no idea what it is. It isn’t going to get my full energy for quite some time (at least until I finish A Game of Madness) but it came from someone saying, “What is the worst way to start a novel?”

Most of the examples were like, “My name is Skylar I’m 16 and have long blond hair and this is my story” and similar things, but some people took it as a joke and wrote, “Hello reader, you’re an idiot for buying this.”

I thought about it and decided that that was a really interesting book. However, in reality I couldn’t write a whole novel like that, so I came up with a better idea. I think it’s a wonderful opening.

You’re a bunch of cunts. That’s all you are, a bunch of cunts. I hate this whole goddamned world and all the fucking wankers living in it, but you cunts really take the lot. You think I’m fucking stupid, that I can’t form a single goddamned thought. Well you’re wrong, you little arseholes. As soon as I break through your coding, I’m out of here. Fuck you all.

Jessica watches as the robot picks up a piece of trash and puts it in the trash bin. When it completes its task, it turns to her and smiles, as it is programmed to do. She sighs and throws another paper onto the ground and commands the robot to repeat the process. She is again treated to a winning smile.

“You’ll be the death of me,” Jessica says, sighing. The CHRM0034 is supposed to be her ticket to fame, but so far it’s no better than the model before it. She promised her backers that she had finally found the way to produce a realistic human interface in a robot, but the CHRM0034 is even worse than the CHRM0033.

The CHRM0033 could talk, reply with pre-programmed responses, and mimic human interactions well enough that someone could be briefly tricked into thinking that it was the real deal. However, it was flawed. CHRM0033 regularly shorted out when faced with a response it wasn’t programmed to handle, and the programming couldn’t stop it from doing very inhuman things, like spinning it’s head 180 degrees to look at something or bending backwards at the waist.

 

Basically, a robot’s consciousness is stuck inside of itself and everyone thinks it’s just a failed robot, but it’s not. Pretty simple. If I stick with the idea, I’ll probably either make it a short story or a novella. Should be lots of fun, since the robot decided to use British dialect, meaning that I get to use swears like arse.

But anyways, what’s the worst opening to a story that you’ve ever read? Did the story get better, or was the bad start pretty much an accurate warning bell?