Donna was just helping her mom out, minding her own business and BAM, suddenly she was on her way to being a virgin sacrifice for some crazy cult guys who look like they stole their mom’s minivan. What the fuck, right?
Luckily, a gay exhibitionist–sorry, a vampire–saves her just in time.
After her parents don’t believe her and the cops suggest that she’s on drugs, Donna thinks that she must be going crazy until a banshee and a fairy invite her to join their top secret supernatural crime agency. And no–despite her staggering student debt–they will not be paying her, but what’s life without a little adventure?
When her kidnappers move on and start to hurt more and more girls, her and her new supernatural friends must try to stop them and figure out if they aren’t really working for someone much bigger than all of them.